Sander's Courage Read online

  We didn't speak for the longest time. Jannik was

  engrossed in the flight manual he found in the seat pocket,

  and I was still feeling sore from the residual adrenaline left

  over from the rescue. Sander whispered something in

  Jannik's ear and the boy brightened and nodded his head.

  He unsnapped his seat belt and Sander pulled him onto

  his lap. Then they stared transfixed out the window, both

  alone in their thoughts. It was their moment to share.

  I glanced out my window and thought about how

  different this day could have been, and quickly quashed

  that line of negative thinking. Our family was whole again,

  and that's what mattered most.

  "Johnnie!" came the squeaky little voice. I turned to

  see Jannik and Sander looking at me. Jannik held out his

  hand. I took his hand in mine and scooted into the seat

  next to them. Now it was all full circle, and we had

  triumphed over the evil happenings that had tried so hard

  to destroy our serenity. We'd won.

  "I love you, Johnnie, wery mush and you and

  brother has to be for me always, okay?" Jannik declared.

  "No worries ever about that, right Pokes?" I said.

  Sander gave his brother a squeeze and we sat back and

  enjoyed the moment as the helicopter chased the sun

  home.

  "LOOK! IT'S ODENSE DOWN THERE!" Jannik exclaimed.

  "I think we is home wery soon."

  "I think you're right, cowboy," Sander said. "You

  must sit in your chair and put your seat belt on." A couple

  of minutes later came the welcome sound of the landing

  gear dropping and locking into place. And just as quickly,

  the runway and taxiway lights of Odense's Hans Christian

  Andersen airport appeared below. The copter kissed the

  landing pad, and the door opened as the blades whirled to

  a stop. And there they were. Not just Mama and Pop, but

  sister, grandma, grandpa, assorted cousins—shit! It's Uncle

  Ole!—and of course the media was there. This was a big

  story anywhere, but in Odense it was massive.

  Three policemen walked to the chopper door and

  formed a little protection cadre around us, and the second

  she caught sight of her boys, Magda broke through the

  barrier and said Fuck it! I'm gonna hug my kid! Yep. We

  were home, and the Family Hansen had come out in force

  to prove it.

  The short drive to the Hansen house resembled a

  motorcade, what with all the relatives and news people

  following.

  A funny incident occurred when Niels pulled into a

  gas station to fill the tank and all of the cars behind us

  followed him in. But we were the only ones getting gas,

  and the kid working the cash window was confused when

  we pulled out and all of the others did too, none stopping

  at the pumps for gas.

  Soon we were home, and everybody piled into the

  house. Magda even invited the news crews in, and it soon

  turned into a party. We stayed up until well past three,

  and by the time the night was over there were no strangers

  amongst us. The news folk were our new friends, and

  Mama and Pop said we could all sleep in as long as we

  wanted to.

  Pokey and me went up to his old room, and we

  instantly fell asleep in each others' arms. I'd never fallen

  asleep so fast. To think that morning we were in the

  Shithole of Murmansk, and tonight we were in our own

  beds kind of fucked with our heads a little bit. But it was

  truly amazing.

  When we woke up a third musketeer had joined us.

  He'd snuck in sometime in the night, and he was splayed

  all over, each limb pointed in a different direction. Jannik

  was fast asleep and was in no danger of waking up any

  time too soon. I smiled at Sander and he just turned on his

  side and watched his little brother sleep.

  "I can't believe he's really here."

  "I know."

  "You were right," he said. "You said we'd get him

  back and we did. You did."

  "We all did. Truth be told, it was Marge and

  Signe who really did it," I told him. "I don't know what we

  would've done without those two."

  "How can anybody be so hateful, you know?"

  Sander asked. "I mean, first some people were hurt and

  died at the duty free, and then what happened to Jannik.

  Why do they do this?"

  "Your guess is better than mine," I admitted. "I

  don't know what the purpose of meanness is. What do

  people get from doing bad things to other people? I don't

  know. I just don't."

  Sander gathered his thoughts, pausing to gaze out

  the skylight. The rain had moved on, so it was a puffy

  cloud day; a perfect day for being together, for doing

  something. But all any of us wanted to do was to stay right

  where we were.

  "The thing what makes me worry now is I don't

  want Jannik to make his heart hard, you know? He is so

  much a kind and sweet boy, and I don't want this to make

  him be hard to others and to himself," Sander explained.

  "He needs to stay who he is, and I think maybe I am scared

  that he won't."

  "Well, he's gonna grow up. Especially now. But I

  don't think anything could change who he is, Pokey. That

  one is special, and I think it'll take more than a stupid

  Russian and his loser Arabs to change Jannik."

  "I am hoping you are right, of course. And you

  probably are. But I want to make for sure that my mother

  and father watch for if he has any changes that aren't so

  good," Sander said.

  "You know they will. So will Ingrid. And both of

  us," I pointed out. "That kid has a thousand eyes on him,

  and nine hundred of 'em belong to angels. He's protected."

  "What is it you two boys is talk about?" Jannik

  asked, his eyes closed.

  "How long a time have you listened to us?" Sander

  asked.

  "Long enough. I hear all. I see all. I am Jannik the

  Great."

  Sander shook his head. "Well, he's back."

  Chapter 12

  human being's capacity for resilience is fascinating

  to me. I once had the opportunity to talk with a

  A Jewish woman who had survived both the

  Auschwitz and Ravensbrück concentration camps, and she told me that within a week after regaining her strength, the

  first thing she did was go to a movie.

  Jannik fell right back into the rhythm of his life and

  was soon playing with friends and asking to go to town, or

  to game online with his mates. It was good to see, but there

  was something different about him. Sander noticed that

  his fuse was shorter than usual concerning small stuff that

  didn't matter, but that the things that should matter, didn't.

  As long as I had known Jannik I'd never seen him

  display a foul temper, but one afternoon, when I drove

  him into town, he went ballistic when I passed the store he

  wanted to go to, and then he berated me on the quick and

  dirty parking job I did.

  Magda was beside herself. She told Niels one night

&nb
sp; that the boy sleeping upstairs was not the same boy who'd

  gone to the duty free store with his brothers that Saturday

  morning. And Ingrid was heartbroken.

  He was kind of her favorite, and while he was

  never nasty towards her, he showed little affection and

  deflected her many attempts to engage him in

  conversation. Something had to be done, but what?

  Then came Sander. It was like Jannik was glued to

  him. He even wanted to sit with him in the bathroom

  when he went for a shower. Jannik would plant himself on

  the closed toilet lid and talk, talk, talk. It didn't matter

  what about; some of the most inane conversations

  happened between them in those strange days. I was at the

  library one morning when my phone rang.

  "Johnnie it's Pokey."

  "I know. You know how I know? Because I can see

  your pretty picture looking back at me and the ringtone is

  our song," I chuckled.

  "Where are you right now?" he asked.

  "The central library. Why?"

  "The transport section?"

  "You know me so well," I joked.

  "Can you stay there please until I am there? I very

  much need to be talking to you about what is important.

  And so will you stay?"

  "What do you think?" I smiled into the phone. He

  knew the answer anyway.

  "Okay, I'll be there in twenty minutes and I'll tell

  you. Maybe we can go for lunch and I will pay for the

  foods, and so can talk with you about it, okay?"

  "Love you. See you," was my reply. And I headed

  downstairs to the curb to wait for my totally cute and sexy

  driver to pick me up and whisk me off for a two hour

  lunch date.

  "THANKS FOR CHANGING YOUR DAY because I really

  need you right now, Johnnie," Sander began. We had

  chosen Målet for lunch, one of Odense's tastiest restaurants

  with a kind of sports pub theme.

  "I am very, very

  worried about Jannik, and so I have idea which I think is

  good but I want to, uh, to make a talk with you about it,"

  he said.

  "Yeah, of course. What are you thinking?"

  "He is not the way he usually is, I think we can

  agree, yes?" Sander stated. "He worries me and I know he

  worries you, too, because I see in your face that he does."

  "I know," I agreed. "So what are you thinking?"

  "I think he shall see a doctor who can help.....

  maybe help him with what happened. I think he shall see

  a—well, in Danish is call a psykiater," Sander explained.

  "Psychiatrist."

  "Yes, that's the one. He must, because he'll have to

  deal with what happened, and if he waits too long, maybe

  his life go bad or maybe he feel—damn, I hate when I can't

  think of the word on English!" Sander said. "So I say in

  Danish... Maybe he feel deprimeret, you know?

  Deprimerit—sad all time."

  "Depressed, I think. Yeah?"

  "Yes! That the one! Depress. So do you think I am

  wrong for this?" he asked.

  "Nope. I agree one thousand percent. What will

  your mom and dad say?"

  "They will do what I say. This I can promise. When

  it come to Jannik, they know I have special forbindelse.

  Damn! You know... Together like one?" Sander explained.

  "Like special communicate?"

  "No, I get it. And yes, I think you do. I'm sure

  Ingrid will agree, too. So next we have to talk with the

  little guy," I said. "How do you think he'll take it?"

  "If I say, and if you say, and if we promise him that

  it will help him, he will do it. This I know."

  "Then let's pick him up after school and talk with

  him. Done deal," I said.

  He smiled at me with a relief that I couldn't really

  grasp. I mean, why would he even worry about what I

  think? This was his brother we were discussing, and at the

  end of the day no one had to tell Sander Lars Hansen what

  he needed to do on Jannik's behalf. He always had his

  brother's best interests at heart, but I was touched that he

  would consider what I had to say. And besides, who

  would have ever disagreed with such a pointed and

  proper plan of action? Bottom line, the kid needed help

  and Pokey was gonna see that he got it.

  "Do we have time for lunch, then?" I asked him.

  "We can just get something on the fly and take it with us.

  He gets out in, what, about an hour from now?"

  "No, we has time and like I say before, is my treat. I

  pay the ticket and we have a good steak or schnitzel. So

  let's enjoy this time together, and then we fix Jannik and

  make everything good again, Johnnie boy!"

  "SANDER! SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!" said the school's

  office manager when we approached her counter in the

  central lobby. "You were always my favorite, you know,"

  she smiled.

  "You say that to all the kids," Sander teased. "I

  know your tricks, Lotte."

  "No! I mean it. You were always so sweet, and

  never gave me any trouble."

  "That you know about!" Sander laughed.

  "Oh!" she grinned. "So what can I help you with?"

  "We're here to collect Jannik, and we wondered if

  you could send a note to his class so he'll come meet us

  here instead of go home," Sander asked.

  "Better than that, here's a pass," she said, scribbling

  on a pink pad, "because I know Jytte would love to see her

  favorite student! You can sit with them for the last half

  hour and then he can leave with you after, no problem."

  "Same room?"

  "Same room!" she said. "You know the way."

  I followed Pokey through the halls, taking note of

  the cute little art projects and decorations the children had

  posted all around the school. This felt like a happy place,

  and I was a little envious of it when I compared it to my

  own middle school years.

  The students were polite to

  one another, and the teachers appeared to genuinely listen

  and care what they had to say. The fact that it was so

  evident that one could size up the situation in minutes

  proved the point. The parents were definitely getting their

  tax-money's-worth. These kids were truly being educated.

  "Sander Hansen, you are all grown up!" said Jytte

  Carlsen when he entered the classroom. "Jannik, it's your

  brother!"

  "Hello, Jytte. This is Johnnie. He's American but he

  lives—"

  "I know exactly who he is! We are all so happy to

  meet you, Johnnie! People, this is Jannik's brother and his

  man, Johnnie, who we saw in the newspaper and on the

  television. Sander was my student for four years, and I am

  so proud of him!"

  "Thank you, Jytte. Uh, Lotte gave me this so we can

  collect Jannik after class."

  "Sure! Sure! Can you share a little about what

  happened last month? It's not every day that we have two

  real heroes visit Marie Jørgensen's Skole!"

  "Really, it is Johnnie who helped. You can ask him,

  but I was just there waiting for Jannik when they brought

  him out," Sand
er explained.

  "If it's not too much trouble?" she asked, shooting

  me a little smile. I spent a couple of minutes regurgitating

  everything that had already been reported in the news,

  making sure to edit out the terrifying aspects that Jannik

  had experienced. But that did the trick anyway. And both

  Sander and I could see that Jannik felt important seeing his

  big brother and me visiting the class. The bell came soon

  enough and we helped Jannik gather his coat and his

  books and made our way to Pokey's car.

  "It was wery big surprise to have you at the class!"

  Jannik enthused. "I think sometime maybe some are not

  believing what happen even if it in the news, because some

  just are like that," he said. "But now they know because

  you are there!"

  "It was nice to visit everyone," Sander said with a

  gentle smile. "You have a very nice class I think."

  "They're okay. But why do you come to get me? I

  always walk home, you know..."

  "Well because Johnnie and me want to take you to

  our place for the weekend and have a really important talk

  with you. If that's okay with you," he said.

  "Oh yes, of course. Do we have to go to my house

  first?"

  "Nope. Mama and Pop knows you are with us. And

  you have plenty of things to wear there and plenty of

  things to play with, so we're ready to go!"

  "Okay! The Olsen Band is together again! I'll be

  Egon!" Jannik laughed, referring to the long-running

  comedy film series about the exploits of the dunderheaded

  Olsen family of crooks. Watching those films, you'd have

  to recognize the similarities between the crazy characters

  and our very own Uncle Ole.

  "Did you know that the Queen comes here on

  Saturday in her big white ship?" Jannik informed us. "It's a

  very pretty boat and she has some wiener dogs and Prince

  Henrik got really fat and he's old. Can you believe it?"

  "Really? And how do you know all of this?" Sander

  asked as we arrived at the car.

  "Oh, we learn she comes in her ship at school, and

  they give us little flags to wave if we go and see her. And I

  see Prince Henrik in Billed Bladet and he looks like a big,

  French balloon. He has a wine castle in France, did you

  know this? I think he maybe drinks too much of it," Jannik

  declared.

  "Well, aren't you just the little journalist," Sander

  teased. "If I want to know anything about anything, I'll see